Tyra Banks Confesses: 'Breasts Are Real. But I'm A Man.'

(Los Angeles–CA) Tyra Banks, who recently had a sonogram on her talk show to allay persistent rumors that she had breast implants, was true to her word “they’re real and they’re fabulous.” Unfortunately, she is a he. Tryra Banks admitted today that she was a man. “I’m glad to finally get it off of my chest,” said Banks during a press conference at the Regent Beverly Wilshire, “my real chest.”

It seems that Tyra Banks of Los Angeles was actually Tyrell Banks of Chatsworth. The Adam’s Apple would have never been noticed had Banks not agreed to a hormone test along with the sonogram. The test revealed a high level of testosterone. Garth Fisher, the plastic surgeon who examined Banks on her show, described his reaction. “I saw that testosterone number, and I asked her: ‘Do you shave?’ She nodded. I added ‘your face?’ I had my answer from her smile.”

Banks announced that she would change the name of her company from TY Inc. to TV Inc. She also stated that she would go by both names Tyra and Tyrell because “as a woman, it’s my prerogative to change my mind; as a man, that’s what I hate about myself.” Banks also expressed disbelief at how long she was able to contain her secret. “I thought that this would come out when I was on the cover of “Sports Illustrated.” I was pre-op then. Lucky for me it was a cold day.”

Reaction to Banks’ announcement was swift and varied. When asked in a phone interview by AP what he thought of the revelation, John Singelton, who dated the leggy “super man-del” was terse. “It doesn’t make me gay! Hand jobs don’t count.” “People Magazine”, who voted Banks one of The Most Beautiful People In The World, attempted to remain above “being punk’d.” In a statement, “People” claimed “it is no accident that we categorized Ms./Mr. Banks ‘people’. We intuited her androgynous gender, but respected it. For God’s sake, she wears a size nine shoe.”

In a related note, Tyrell Banks has signed an exclusive deal with Victoria’s Secret for a new line of jock straps.

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