User Reports Bing Better Than Google


Greg David, a 20 year old college student at UC Davis, told Unconfirmed Sources that Microsoft’s new search engine Bing is superior to the Google search engine.

“I enter the words ‘hot springs’ in quotes into both Google and Bing. Bing provided me with 127,000,000 listings whereas Google only gave me 12,800,000. That’s ten times as many listings from Bing as from Google”, the bespectacled youth declared.

Jane Bellanbeel, A Google spokesperson, defended Google’s search engine claiming that Google only lists the top 12,800,000 requests whereas Bing lists everything including the things people don’t want to know.

“If you browse through the listings”, Bellanbeel began, “You will notice Bing has worthless, no good, shitty listings whereas we have highly refined, intelligent listings. And the first million or so listings are the same anyway”.

“I’m not satisfied with just a dozen million listings”, David declared. “My searches don’t even start until I’ve gone through the first 8 million”.

The Google spokesperson pointed out that it would take several years to go through even the first 5 million listings even working day and night. She also pointed out that most people rarely go past the first page of listings.

David also pointed out that the Bing search engine is faster than Google. “It took me .12 seconds from Google to find those 12 million listings”, David said. “It took only .9 seconds for Bing to find 10 times that many”.

At this point Bellanbeel threw up her hands and shouted, “WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES A HUNDREDTH OF A F…..KING SECOND MAKE???”

“It makes a difference to ME”, Davis said forcefully.

Bing spokespeople such as David’s father were unavailable for comment.