USS TrumpCare Strikes Heller’s Rock, Burns

Uss TrumpCare Burning Out of Control.
Uss TrumpCare Burning Out of Control.

(Chesapeake Bay) Unconfirmed Sources report that the Navy’s newest ship the USS TrumpCare struck a submerged rock and is now burning out of control.   The unlucky vessel launched last week was on sea trials in the Chesapeake Bay when the accident occurred.

Just after sunset Sunday night the hospital ship slammed into an unseen rock at full speed.   The deadly submerged rock, known as Heller’s Reef, punched a massive hole in the USS Trumpcare.

The vessel hung on the rock for several hours before drifting free.  The vessel has caught fire and is burning out of control.

Reports from the stricken vessel indicate that while the crew has escaped major injuries the ship is in grave peril.  A massive fire amidships has crippled the ship’s engines and divided the crew as they battle the raging flames.  The vessel is settling low in the water imperiling the 538 crew members.  The ship’s commander, Captain Ryan, has vowed to save the ship.

The fire rescue ship the USS McConnell is in the area, but it seems unlikely that the 100 man crew can do anything to save the damaged vessel.

The real story.

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