Unconfirmed sources report that a secret internal White House poll found that support for the war in Iraq has surged in the wake of the Presidents speech yesterday. The President has taken time away from his much needed vacation to bring the case for war in Iraq to the American people again. Speaking to an all military crowd the President once again used stirring words to make his case that the war in Iraq is a noble cause. If this secret poll is to be believed Americans are finally backing the President in his efforts.
“Boy did we need this boost.” Said White House spokesmen Ben Lion, on double secret deep deep background. “Things were starting to look a little grim for the President with the war going south and his Social Security plan in the toilet, so this is great news. To find that 142% of American support our efforts is really great. I think this could really kick start our future war plans and our other senseless domestic policy initiatives.”
The secret poll, taken last night after the President’s speech, was designed to discover which of the President’s two dozen arguments for war was the most effective so the speech could be improved. The results of the poll where such a surprise that the White House decided to let news of the poll ‘leak’ to the media.
“This could not have happened at a better time for the President.” Says influential right wing war monger Christopher Hitchens, who met with us at a local watering hole. “It’s about damn time the American people got their heads out of the sand and stood up for what is right. Ever since 9-11 the world has become a different place, a place where the big dogs need to lead the pack. America is the big dog around here and Americans need to start acting like it. Waiter! I’ll have another brandy! Make it a double!”
The President is scheduled to make another speech tomorrow in the left wing haven of Idaho and this poll should give him confidence that his message is finally hitting home. With 142% of Americans behind him the President is really on a roll.