New York, NY (APE) – The Fox News division apparently became the first “news outlet” in the United States to be hit by the national screenwriters strike. Corporate president Rupert Murdoch today announced that Fox News would begin airing reruns in all of its news shows starting with the nightly broadcast from Britt Hume. The Fox News division has reportedly become paralyzed by the lack of experienced fiction writers, and their on-screen persona have not been able to rise to the task of on-air ad-libbing. The national screenwriters strike enters its third day with no end in sight.
“The true culprit in this mess appears to be George Soros,” complained Fox news division head Roger Ailes,” and we look forward to exposing this liberal stranglehold after the strike is broken.”
Audiences were reportedly stunned last night as flagship pundit Bill O’Reilly sat speechless alternately smiling and growling at the camera for the last 15 minutes of his show, “The O’Reilly Factor”.
Fox’s fledgling business news show has reportedly been hit the hardest, and will likely be canceled.
Fox will continue to air its most popular themes in rerun form until the strike has ended. Viewers can look forward to a repeat of the president’s successes in dealing with hurricane Katrina, presidential candidate and former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani’s sterling leadership immediately after the 9/11 attacks, and extensive footage of the end of hostilities in Iraq.
Media watchers have stated that they expect other news broadcasts to begin falling victim to the strike if it continues longer. CBS news has reportedly begun examining options for anchor Katie Couric hosting an evening cooking show alongside Martha Stewart if the strike persists.