Zero Shortage Threatens Obama Stimulus Plan

Unconfirmed sources are reporting that a shortage of zeros, is threatening to derail the Obama transition team’s stimulus plans. The impending shortage of the “0” digit was discovered yesterday as copies of the proposed plan were being printed to distribute to members of congress. All federal agencies are being tasked to help conserve zeros until the crisis is over.

“I was watching the print outs come off the machine when I noticed that some of the budget numbers looked too small.” Says Stacey Goodman, of the Obama transition team. “I noticed that some of the zero’s were missing. I then went to refill the zeros in the printer and found out the whole office was out. I then called around and discovered that everybody was running low on zeros.”

It seems that the massive size of all the numbers flying around Washington are putting a strain on the nation’s zero supply. A quick informal survey of zero suppliers finds that, industry wide, zero’s are being used faster than they can be made.

“I’ve never seen anything like it.” Says Ken Burton of Burton Digital Digits Manufacturing Co. “We are normally able to keep up with the demand for all numerals and letters, but the size of the numbers being used today has caught all of us suppliers off guard. We are trying to ramp up production of zeros, but these things take time. It could be weeks before we can meet the new demand.”

In the mean time government officials and suppliers are recommending that people try to use other digits to conserve the number of zero’s available.