Nude Britney Pics Prompt State of Emergency in Pakistan
by Dood Abides
Los Angeles, CA (O! Online) - Pictures of a nude Britney Spears along with companion Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf surfaced today, prompting the dictator/president to declare a state of emergency in his home country. Eyewitness accounts stated that a drunken Spears had returned to the hotel and hot tub of her previous assignation with a 21-year-old college student, and demanded satisfaction from an older man. Musharraf, who apparently had had a bit to drink as well, stripped down and entered the tub with Miss Spears. Pictures of the incident have apparently surfaced in Pakistan prompting the Pakistani Congress to demand Musharraf's resignation.
A spokesperson for Musharraf insisted that the president was innocent, and had indeed been visiting the United States clandestinely in an effort to meet with California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger in regards to his possible presidential candidacy. Musharraf's spokesperson further stated that the President was obviously being set up by the American CIA.
Eyewitnesses consistently reaffirmed the story and specifics in regards to the meeting between the two. They stated that there was an obvious degree of mutual attraction between the two, with Spears referring to the president as "Pervy". Spears cheered loudly, insisting that the president walked in the nude as if on a fashion runway. Eyewitnesses related that Musharraf was adorned with multiple "support the troops" fake tattoos covering strategic locations on his body.
Security services for both Musharraf and Spears broke up the meeting before it progressed much farther. Upon Musharraf's return home, he promptly declared martial law in Pakistan.
A spokesperson for Miss Spears stated that she was disappointed over the turn of events, and hoped that she would be able to continue the relationship with Musharraf. According to the spokesperson, Spears was pleasantly surprised at how well the president interacted with her two infant sons, and was interested in his suggestion that they might benefit from a madrasas education. "I think we should all just trust the president," concluded Spears.